University of Maine Cooperative Extension
Bulletin #4219

Months 2 and 3

How Baby is Changing

Life with a new baby is hectic. Much of the time it seems your needs take a back seat to your baby’s needs. But by the second month, baby may be settling into a more predictable schedule. For many babies, night-time sleeping lengthens (thank goodness) and feedings may be every four hours.

Baby is beginning to be more interested in things, looking around and listening to sounds. His movements are getting smoother, less jerky, and he may have better control over his head and neck. Maybe he can hold his head and chest up while he is on his tummy.

He might even be able to roll from his side to his back. Don’t leave him alone on a counter, table or bed. He might flip or wiggle off.

While you’re keeping a watchful eye on your little one, you’ll be rewarded: smiles! Social smiles usually start in the second month. When you smile at him, he smiles back.

Even though your baby is still very young, he needs your praise and approval. When you get excited about his new talents, he does, too. This keeps him working hard to learn even more.

By now, someone has probably told you that feeding your baby solid foods, like cereal, will help him sleep through the night. While you may want to try anything to get a whole night’s sleep, solid foods probably aren’t the answer.

Giving solids before 3 or 4 months might cause choking. Babies aren’t yet ready to swallow anything but liquids. If you try, baby’s tongue will push the food out of his mouth.

Babies don’t need solids for nutrition until 4 to 6 months. Breast milk or formula have all the nutrients they need. Also, babies given solid foods too early can gain too much weight.

Sometimes solids given too early can cause food allergies. The foods are not digested properly and the body treats them as “foreign bodies.”

You’ll know your baby is old enough for solid foods when he can sit well with support, has good head and neck control and can turn his head away on purpose if he doesn’t like a food or has had enough. This usually happens around 4 to 6 months.

In the 4 and 5 month fact sheet in this series, we’ll tell you how to start your baby on solid foods.

Thumb or Pacifier?

Babies need to suck, and sometimes feeding isn’t enough to meet their sucking needs. Extra sucking on a finger, thumb, fist or pacifier can help baby to calm herself down when she is upset.

Finger sucking is natural. Some babies suck their thumbs even before they are born. Most children will stop thumb sucking by themselves by the time they are 5 years old, if no one draws too much attention to it.

Pacifiers can also calm babies. Babies may prefer a pacifier with a nipple just like his bottle. One-piece pacifiers are safer. Never tie a pacifier around your baby’s neck.

Don’t overuse the pacifier. Try other ways to comfort the baby first, like holding, rocking or singing.

Sleeping Through the Night

Some babies will begin to sleep through their middle-of-the-night feeding by the time they weigh about 11 pounds.

If your baby sleeps through the last feeding of the day, you may want to try waking him an hour later for a feeding. He may then sleep until 5 or 6 a.m. But other 2-month-olds will wake up every few hours to be fed, day or night.

Studies show that infants who sleep on their stomachs have a higher risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), also called “crib death.” To help prevent SIDS, put baby to bed on her back (NOT on sides or tummy) for the first six months on a firm mattress. Use lightweight blankets and tuck bedding in securely at the foot of the crib. Other factors that increase the risk of SIDS are: diet (breastfeeding may reduce an infant’s risk); secondhand smoke; and room temperature (avoid a warm, stuffy room).

Another Word on Colic

All babies cry. Some cry long and often enough to be called “colicky.”

No one knows exactly what causes colic. The baby screams and seems to have stomach pains, but is not seriously ill.

A screaming, colicky baby can make parents feel helpless and angry. Everyone wants a sweet, peaceful baby, not one who won’t stop crying whatever you do.

As hard as it is, try to keep calm. Trying one thing after another to soothe the baby may only make matters worse. Pick a few things that seem to work best, and give them a chance.

Get some time away from the baby. Others won’t mind the crying as much as you do. 

Talk to baby’s doctor, and see what can be done. Sometimes, a change in your diet if you’re nursing, or in the baby’s formula can help.

Medication can be used as a last resort, but doctors disagree on how well it works.

Try to be patient. Colic goes away, usually by 3 or 4 months. If you can forgive and forget the colic, you may even find you have a sweet, peaceful baby after all.

When To Call the Doctor

You’re learning more about your new baby, and now you can probably tell when she isn’t her usual self. No doctor wants to be called for every sniffle, but any doctor would rather have you call with a question than let a problem become serious.

All babies need to eat, sleep, urinate and have bowel movements. If your baby can’t do one of these things as she normally does, call the doctor. Babies can become dangerously dehydrated (dried out) very quickly.

You’ll also want to call if your baby has a fever, seems “floppy” or unresponsive, has bulging or sunken-in soft spots, convulsions (“fits”) or trouble breathing. Sharp crying when lying down that stops when baby is picked up, or rubbing or pulling at an ear can be a sign of an ear infection. Hoarse crying and refusing to eat might mean a sore throat. Call the doctor for these, too.

You know your baby best. If she doesn’t seem quite right to you, trust your judgment, and call your clinic.

Write down the doctor’s advice, and insist he or she repeat anything you don’t understand. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. 

Books on Child Health

Your Baby and Child: From Birth to Age Five, by Penelope Leach, Knopf, 1980. This is a comprehensive book with some medical information and some child care information on development. It answers many of the questions you might ask a pediatrician.

Baby and Child Care, by Benjamin Spock, Pocket Books, 1985. This is still the standard reference to help you decide if your child has chickenpox, pinworms or an earache.

Immunizations
During the second month of life, doctors recommend starting a series of immunizations to protect babies from certain dangerous diseases.

Baby can be immunized by his doctor or clinic. Free immunizations are available in some communities. Immunizations do have some risks and side effects, but they are safer than the diseases would be. If you have questions about immunizing your child, talk to your baby’s doctor or nurse.

Some physicians recommend that baby also receive the Hepatitis B vaccine. 

The web site for the most recent immunization schedule can be accessed at www.cdc.gov/nip/recs/child-schedule.htm#Printable. 

Special for Dads

Researchers tell us that new dads are just as good with babies as new moms are. New dads are even as good at bottle-feeding.

Well-adjusted babies tend to have fathers who are sensitive and help out the child’s mother. As the father and husband, are there ways you can make your partner feel special and cared for each day?

Try to let your love for Mom and baby show. Hugs and kisses are great, and so is helping with the household and childcare chores.

How about taking over for a few hours on an evening or weekend so your partner can have a break? Caring for your baby alone gives you a chance to get to know her better. You can develop your own best way to do things with your child.

Solo time with baby can be scary at first. Try short periods of time to start, maybe carrying baby for a walk or letting your partner sleep while you do the morning feeding.

If your baby is breast-fed, you can still help out by bringing baby to Mom and burping and changing her after she nurses.

Talking for Baby to See

Your baby is beginning to know your voice, and likes to look into your eyes when you talk. Why not make a game out of it?

Put baby on your lap, facing you, with her face about eight to 12 inches away from yours. Lean toward her and talk happily. Pause and give her a chance to smile, gurgle, wiggle or move her mouth back at you!

Try doing these things one at a time: smile, stick out your tongue, open and close your mouth or eyes widely or shake your head back and forth while you talk. Watch closely. What does your baby do? Does she smile, gurgle, wiggle?

Give her time to respond. She doesn’t have full control of her body yet. If she makes a sound, repeat it back to her and she’ll be thrilled. In a few months, she’ll babble back when you talk to her, just like a real conversation. Taking turns like this helps your baby learn to talk.

Other things that help a baby learn are:

• Music played regularly, but not all the time. (Not too loud).

• A bell sewn securely to her bootie.

• Singing to her and telling her nursery rhymes.

• Wind chimes or a mobile hung in her room. 

Child Care: What to Look for

You may worry about leaving your child in someone else’s care. The more you trust your caregiver, the more secure you will feel. 

Does the Caregiver:

• Have child-rearing attitudes similar to yours?

• Have training to understand what children can and want to do at different stages of growth?

• Spend time holding, playing with and talking to your baby?

• Have enough time to look after all the children in care?

• Welcome visits from parents?

Does the Home or Center Have:

• Few children (infants do better in small groups)?

• A clean and comfortable look?

• Equipment that is safe and in good repair?

• Nutritious meals and snacks, if provided?

Are There Chances for Children:

• To be held, cuddled, rocked, smiled at, talked to?

• To relax and rest when they need to?

• To crawl and explore safely?

• To play with objects that develop their senses of touch, sight and hearing? (Mobiles, mirrors, rattles, things to squeeze and roll, pots and pans, soft toys, etc.)?

• To learn language by the caregiver talking to the child, naming things, describing what she/he is doing, responding to the child’s actions?

Questions and Answers

Will my baby be OK in day care?

Placing babies in day care is very common today. But is it OK for babies? Yes, if it’s good day care.

First, no one has ever expected one or two parents to raise their children all alone, without help from anyone. Good parents have always counted on family, friends, neighbors and churches.

Today, the paid child care provider is another person in the community who helps parents.

If you want to stay home to raise your baby, and you can, then you certainly should. You and your baby will gain from your time together.

On the other hand, if you want to (or have to) work outside the home, then staying home with your baby might be a mistake.

There are two important questions to ask yourself before you decide on a caregiver. First, does she or he enjoy your child? Babies need lots of loving and attention.

Second, will she or he be there during the hours you need in the months to come? Babies need to form close bonds with people, and can suffer if they have too many caregivers.

Children do best when their parents are happy and when they have a caring, sensitive caregiver, at home and in day care.

Your Extension office has more information on day care.

For more information on family issues, contact your county Extension office or the Family Living Office, University of Maine Cooperative Extension, 5717 Corbett Hall, Orono, ME 04469-5717, (207) 581-3448/3104 or 1-800-287-0274 (in Maine).

Published and distributed in furtherance of Acts of Congress of May 8 and June 30, 1914, by the University of Maine Cooperative Extension, the Land Grant University of the state of Maine and the U.S. Department of Agriculture cooperating. Cooperative Extension and other agencies of the U.S.D.A. provide equal opportunities in programs and employment.

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