University of Maine Cooperative Extension
Bulletin #4221

Months 4 and 5

How Baby Is Changing

Baby is starting to tell people apart, and he knows his mom and dad! He’ll smile more at real people than at pictures of faces. He might have favorite toys, too.

He can probably roll from side to side, and might even be able to go from his tummy to his back. Watch out! Your little athlete could roll off a counter or changing table.

Baby is starting to learn that things go together. When he hears you in the kitchen, he expects dinner time. He likes to splash in the bathtub, and loves to see himself in the mirror.

His reaching and grasping skills are getting better. Watch him when he wants a toy. At first, he had to look from his hand to the toy. As he gets better, he grabs for it directly without looking at his hand first.

Whatever he reaches goes right into his mouth! You’ll want to be sure he can only reach things that are clean and safe for him to chew on.

Baby may be getting his first teeth, though most babies begin teething at six months. Usually, the two lower front teeth are first. Look for information on teething.

Learning Through Touch

Early on, baby plays with his hands and feet and learns about his body. He learns about others this way, too. By now, he may have grabbed for your hair or patted your face as a way of learning who you are.

Feeling his blanket, a cuddly toy or the bathwater helps baby learn about other things in his world. Give him different textures to feel, like sand, rice, soft fuzzy things, ice cubes or a sponge. You can think of others.

Your baby also learns by being touched. He senses how you feel about him from your handling. The amount of holding and touching tells baby how important touch is.

If you hold your baby only when you have to bathe or change him, you are both missing out on a lot of times to be close and to learn.

Touch and hold your baby often. That’s how he learns that you’re near and you care. Most of all, baby learns “I’m OK.” Give baby lots of hugs and kisses, pats, rocking, stroking and massages.

Learning to Talk

Every sound your baby makes is a forerunner of true speech. Learning to talk is a process with many steps. Each child reaches these steps on his own time schedule.

Research shows that when parents talk to their babies, it helps the babies learn language and thinking skills. Parents don’t “teach” children to talk, but you can help your baby learn. First, you are a role model for him to copy. And secondly, he needs chances to practice making sounds, and praise from you when he does.

Even when you aren’t playing, talk to your baby! Keep sentences short and simple.

When you’re cooking or cleaning up, put baby in a safe spot in his infant seat so he can watch you. Talk to him about what you’re doing. Show him vegetables, and talk about their colors and sizes, for example.

Bathtime is a good time to play “this little piggy.” Point out baby’s body parts and talk about water. Naming games, like “where are ________’s toes?” help him to learn the meanings of words.

Encourage his “talking” by talking to baby and pausing to give him a chance to answer. Even if he smiles or waves his arms instead of making a sound, he’s learning that conversation is a two-way street.

At this age, baby makes mostly vowel sounds like “ah,” “ay,” “oo,” and “oh.” He probably says them over and over as if he’s practicing. Soon he’ll make consonant sounds, too.

What About Baby Talk?

Baby talk like, “Isn’t oo mama’s precious uzzums” probably doesn’t help baby learn to talk, because it’s hard to understand and some of the words don’t mean anything.

There is another kind of baby talk that is useful. Researchers call it “Motherese.” Motherese means repeating words (choo choo), or ending words with an “ee” sound (doggie). 

This gives baby extra chances to hear the sounds. Try saying “dog” out loud. Now say “doggie.” Isn’t it much easier to hear the “g”?

Even very young children talk to babies in high-pitched voices and use Motherese. Researchers have found that people all over the world speak to babies this way.

Whatever you say to your baby, speak clearly so he can hear each word. And have fun.

Starting Solid Foods

Does your baby sit well with support? Hold her head up without wobbling? Put things in her mouth and chew on them? These are some signs that she’s ready to start solid foods.

Many doctors recommend starting with rice cereal. It is fortified with iron and not likely to cause food allergies. Mix a tablespoon of cereal with breast milk or formula until it’s smooth and about as thick as cream.

Pick a time when baby is hungry, but not starving. It may help to give her some milk or formula, then try cereal and finish with more milk. Hold her on your lap.

Use a small, narrow spoon and put a little cereal at a time toward the middle of baby’s tongue. Her tongue may push the food back out. Be patient. It takes time to learn how to chew and swallow. Using a big bib will cut down on the mess. Start with small amounts and slowly add more.

Do not use an infant feeder, syringe or bottle to feed solid foods. These can cause choking. They don’t help baby learn to eat from a spoon, and they can cause overeating.

Fruits and vegetables are probably the next things to try. Give each food for three or four days before adding a new food. This gives you a chance to see if the new food causes an allergy or tummy upset. Give single foods (like pears) before trying mixed foods (like peaches and pears together) for the same reason.

If you make your own baby food, avoid beets, spinach, carrots and cabbage. They are naturally high in nitrates, which can cause “blue baby” disease.

Even with solid foods, baby still needs formula. Baby should drink either breast milk or formula, not cow’s milk, until he is a year old. Cow’s milk can cause allergies if it is given to children who are too young. Your baby’s doctor may have other suggestions, too.

Babies Need Water

Babies get thirsty, too. Offer baby water, especially in hot weather or when he has a fever. A sip of water from a spoon sometimes cures hiccups.

This month, try giving baby tiny sips of cold water from a small, plastic measuring cup (1/4 cup size). Go slowly.

When you travel with baby, take some of your tap water along in a bottle, or buy distilled water. A change of water can make a baby sick.

Is Your Water Safe?

If you have a private well, we recommend you have it tested for nitrates and bacteria. Water from some private wells in Maine has nitrate levels that are dangerous for babies and pregnant women.

When water contains more than 10 mg. per liter of nitrates (reported as nitrogen), it does not meet standards. You can ask for test kits from: Dept. of Human Services Health and Environmental Testing Lab, 221 State St., Station #12, Augusta, ME 04333, (207) 287-1716.

If your water has too many nitrates, you may need to redrill your well or use bottled water. Nitrates are a problem for babies under 6 months old.

Moving to a Big Bathtub

If you’ve been using the kitchen sink or a special baby tub for baby’s baths, he may be starting to outgrow it.

Here are a few things you can try to make the move to a big bathtub easier for you and your baby:

• If you use a baby tub, try putting it into the bathtub for a few days and bathing baby inside it.

• Take a bath with baby. Don’t hold him in your arms when you get in or out; you could slip and fall. Put him on the floor on a towel.

• Bathe baby slowly and gently until he gets used to it.

• Never leave your baby alone in a bathtub even for a minute. If the phone rings, wrap him in a towel and take him along, or just let it ring.

Having a baby in a big tub can be hard on your back:

1. Bend from your knees, not your hips. Use your stronger leg muscles to help when you lift baby.

2. Hold heavy objects like baby close to your body.

3. Don’t lift and twist at the same time. Lift, then turn.

4. When you can, rest lying down with your knees bent and your feet up.

Can a Baby Obey?

It is important for a child to obey her parents, but a 4-month-old does not understand what you say to her. She hears your tone of voice, and may sense that you are angry.

Research shows that a baby this young is not yet able to control her actions long enough to do what you tell her. And she won’t be able to for some time. So spanking doesn’t help at all.

Being kind and gentle with your baby will help more than anything else. She doesn’t do things on purpose to bother you.

In order for learning and development to move along as they should, the baby’s environment should be calm and loving.

Crib Toy Safety Alert

Be sure to remove crib toys that fit across the crib by the time baby is 5 months old.

When babies can push up on their hands and knees (sometimes at around 5 months), they can fall over a toy and not be able to get free. This could cause strangling.

Hooded sweatshirts and other loose clothing could also be caught on parts of these toys, causing choking. Babies really shouldn’t wear these kinds of clothes to bed.

The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission has a toll-free number you can call to ask questions or report problems with baby products: 1-800-638-CPSC.

My Day Care Provider and I Don’t Agree

Parents often have to make some compromises between “ideal” child care and the actual choices that are available. Some compromises, such as a far-away location, you may simply have to live with.

But if you have other concerns, you may be able to work them out with the provider. Every family raises its children a little differently. If you want your provider to do things differently with your child, talk with her about it. A good provider will welcome this, knowing that she and you are partners who need to cooperate.

Be careful not to say something like:

• “You shouldn’t do that with the children.”

This may offend the provider or start an argument.

Instead, start out by saying:

• “In our family, we prefer to do it this way.”

This shows that you know that other parents may choose to do things differently than you. A good provider can then listen even if she doesn’t agree with you.

Parents and providers can usually work things out. But sometimes your child-rearing ideas will be too far apart. In that case, you should look for another provider.

What Do Providers Complain About?

• Parents who are late picking up their children.

• Parents who are late paying their children’s bills.

Games for Growing: Baby Exercises

One way to have fun together is a daily exercise time. There may be books on exercises for baby in your public library. Here are a couple of examples to try: 

Pull to Sitting: Lay baby down on a blanket or rug and hold both his hands. Slowly pull him up until he’s sitting. You can say things like, “up we go!” At first, you will probably do all the work, but he’ll get the idea soon and may really work hard to help himself up.

Rolling Over: Lay baby on a blanket and sit behind his head, holding a toy. Squeaky toys work well for this. Hold the toy where he can see it and slowly move it so he has to turn his head to follow it.

Praise him if he arches his back and starts to turn. If he turns with his shoulders, but his legs aren’t following, gently push on his bottom to help him over. Save this game for a later time if he doesn’t try at all. Later on, you’ll be able to help baby practice crawling and standing.

Questions and Answers

I think my baby is teething. She’s cranky and drools a lot. What can I do to make her more comfortable?

It is quite normal for babies to get some teeth at this age. While first teeth usually come in at 6 months, some babies get them as early as 3 months, while others don’t get any teeth until they’re a year or older. Once she starts, baby will “teeth” for months.

As teeth push through the gums, your baby may feel some soreness, and become cranky and irritable.

You can ease the soreness by putting an ice cube in a clean cloth and rubbing it on her gums for a few minutes.

Chilling a teething ring in the refrigerator and letting baby chew on it may also help.

If your baby drools a lot and has diarrhea, it may be caused by something other than teething. Don’t blame fever, vomiting, diarrhea or other signs of illness on teething. If your baby shows any of these signs, have him checked by a doctor.

For more information on family issues, contact your county Extension office or the Family Living Office, University of Maine Cooperative Extension, 5717 Corbett Hall, Orono, ME 04469-5717, (207) 581-3448/3104 or 1-800-287-0274 (in Maine).

Published and distributed in furtherance of Acts of Congress of May 8 and June 30, 1914, by the University of Maine Cooperative Extension, the Land Grant University of the state of Maine and the U.S. Department of Agriculture cooperating. Cooperative Extension and other agencies of the U.S.D.A. provide equal opportunities in programs and employment.

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