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Child Development Fact Sheet
This fact sheet series was adapted and reprinted from two Extension publications: Parenting the First Year, a North Central Regional Extension Publication, number 321, produced by UW-Extension, Cooperative Extension, and Parent Express: A Month-by-Month Newsletter for You and Your Baby produced by the University of California Cooperative Extension.

University of Maine Cooperative Extension
Bulletin #4236

Months 25 and 26

Twos Are Terrific and ...

Twos are terrific, tender, trying, taxing and very, very exciting. Your little one has come a long way in two short years, and so have you. As a parent of a 2-year-old, these are some things you will need this next year:

 - Patience to help you cope with your child’s mood swings, from very cooperative to highly unreasonable; 

 - Awareness to help you see that your child’s surroundings are safe;

 - Loving firmness to help you gently apply rules in a consistent way so your child can learn responsibility and self-sufficiency;

 - Humor to help you laugh at yourself and with your child;

 - Wonder to help you see your 2-year-old as the creative, special person she really is; and 

 - Enthusiasm to enjoy and celebrate your toddler’s many accomplishments during this year.

Your Baby Wants You to Know

What’s It Like to Be 2 and 2˝ Years Old?

How I Grow:

  • I often have to look at my feet to keep from stepping on things that are in my way.

  • I like to do things in the same way each day.

  • I like to walk by myself. I don’t like being carried or pushed in a stroller.

  • I can walk backwards for about 10 feet.

  • I can jump with both feet off the ground.

  • I can balance on one foot for about a second.

  • I’m interested in lots of things, but usually just for a few minutes.

  • I get into things and make messes.

  • I can take lids off jars. Be sure things you don’t want me to open have safety caps.

  • I may have learned from adults to fear snakes, mice and spiders.

How I Talk:

  • I like to learn words that describe things like high, big, wet, hard.

  • I can understand sentences, but I can’t say long sentences yet.

  • I like books. I can point to pictures and name them.

  • I usually give information in two- or three-word sentences like “all dirty,” “go to store,” or “that mine.”

  • I can sing parts of songs or all of very short songs.

  • I’m learning what front, back, side and under mean.

  • I am paying more attention now to what people say.

  • I can use plurals like dogs, books, cups.

  • I can imitate my parents’ voices.

  • I talk mostly to myself and adults, not much to other children.

What I Have Learned:

  • I can draw a pretty good circle.

  • I understand why some things happen, like turning on a switch makes the light come on.

  • I’m getting better at remembering and keeping my attention on things.

  • I can sometimes understand “today” and “pretty soon,” but I don’t understand “yesterday.”

  • I’m beginning to understand the difference between one and two.

  • I can sort silverware in a drawer.

How I Get Along with Others:

  • I’m good at getting your attention.

  • Mostly, I’m still just interested in myself.

  • I don’t usually share toys or play well with other children my own age.

  • I may hit other children, not because I don’t like them, but because I just don’t know what else to do.

  • I stare at other people and like being looked at.

  • I may call other children “baby,” men “daddy,” and women “mommy.”

  • If you ask me to do something simple, I can usually do it.

  • I am now more willing to be away from you.

  • I want to do things my own way by myself.

  • I say “no” a lot and often do what you want me not to do just to show you how independent I am.

  • It helps me to feel important if you admire what I have learned to do.

  • I like our routines, like the story and hug you give me before I go to sleep.

What I Can Do for Myself:

  • I can use a spoon and fork pretty well. I still spill some.

  • Sometimes, I can ask to go to the toilet.

  • I like to wash my hands, but not my face.

  • I’m ready to learn to brush my teeth, but you will need to help me until I am older and better coordinated.

  • I’m still better at undressing than dressing.

  • I like to help you put things away and clean things up.

Play I Enjoy:

  • I like to talk to myself when I play.

  • I like wheel toys like kiddie cars. Be sure I ride these safely.

  • I like to play in the bathtub and often don’t want to leave it.

  • I like stories you tell me about myself and my things.

  • I like to run, gallop and sway to music.

  • I like toys that I can pile up or nest or sort by color or size.

  • I like to hear favorite songs over and over again.

  • I sometimes act silly just to make you laugh.

  • I like to paint with large paint brushes and finger paint; I’m pretty messy. 

Toddler Talk

I Like Learning New Words

You can help me learn words.

Research in Brief: Successful Parenting

We know that what parents do for and with their young children affects their children’s development. Dr. Alice Sterling Honig reviewed studies of parenting and child development to find out how parents of competent toddlers behaved with their children. She writes that toddlers who were most competent were the ones whose parents:

Guidance and Self-Esteem

We all want our children to grow up feeling they are capable and lovable. One of the trickiest and most important skills parents must learn is guiding their children in ways that control unwanted behavior and help the children feel good about themselves. This is hard to do when you are angry or upset because your child is causing a problem. You need practice and a lot of patience at these times so you aren’t critical or accusing. Unfortunately, a young child who lives with criticism can begin to feel hopeless, and may stop trying to cooperate. When your child misbehaves, she needs “help-outs” instead of “put-downs.” “Help-outs” make her feel you love her and you know she can learn to do better. “Put-downs” do just the opposite.

The following are “help-out” comments:

The following are destructive “put-down” comments:

Listen to yourself. Try to substitute “help-outs” for “put-downs.”

Watch Out: Prevent Cuts and Scrapes

Small children get minor cuts and scrapes very often. These injuries happen when children fall, run into things or step on sharp objects.

Health: Regular Health Checkups Are Important

Toddlers grow fast. As they grow, they need regular health checkups. Your child’s health examination will give the doctor an opportunity to spot problems early. This way, problems can be taken care of before any serious or long-term effects occur. The record from the health checkups provides information about your child’s health and immunization. You will need this record when you enroll your child in day care, nursery school or kindergarten. If your child needs special food or medication while away from home, the health record gives caregivers the correct medical information. Be sure you keep your health record in a safe place where you can find it easily.

The American Academy of Pediatrics Standards for Child Care recommends that a well-child examination include the following:

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends toddler checkups at about 12 months, 15 months, 24 months, 36 months and, after age 3, every two years. Of course, if parents or doctors have special concerns about the child, examinations will be more frequent.

If you do not have a doctor for your child, ask your local health department. They can give you the name of a physician or health department clinic where you can get a complete examination.

Toilet Training

During their second year, most children become interested in learning to use the toilet on their own. A potty on the floor that the child can use herself helps her to get started. Learning to use the toilet is important to the child, and of course, to her parents. Give her lots of praise for every success.

Don’t scold for accidents. Praise successes. Most children will stop dirtying before they stop wetting. Most will be able to stay dry during the day before they can stay dry at night. Many children cannot stay dry at night until they are about 3 years old. Sometimes, children seem to be toilet trained, and then they start wetting or soiling again. This can happen when the children are upset about something like a new baby in the family, pressure from adults to stay dry, overtiredness or family stress. Again, be patient and caring, and praise successes.

Sure, you’re eager to be rid of diapers, but if you don’t rush toilet training, there will probably be less stress on everyone. Don’t start toilet training until your toddler shows she wants to use the toilet. Then it should go quickly and smoothly. Toilet training should not be upsetting to parents or their children. If it is, wait a few weeks and try again.

Nutrition: Television Tells Toddlers about Cereals

Has this happened to you yet? You are pushing your grocery cart down the aisle of the supermarket. All of a sudden, your toddler sees a certain brand of breakfast cereal. He begins calling out the name of the cereal. He wants you to buy it. You are amazed. You’ve never bought that kind of cereal, and he’s never eaten it. How did he find out about it?

Probably from television. Toddlers don’t seem to pay much attention to television, but they are often aware of what is happening on the screen. Commercials are very appealing because of the action and the noise. The food most often advertised during children’s television programs is cereal. Some of these cereals are nutritious, others are not. In fact, some of these cereals have more sugar than cereal in them. They are more like candy than cereal. 

How can you tell if a cereal is high in sugar? Look for the list of ingredients on the cereal box. They are listed in order of amounts. The first ingredient is what there is most of in the cereal. The last ingredient is what there is least of in the cereal. If the first ingredient in the list is sugar, there is more sugar in the cereal than anything else. You will want to choose another cereal lower in sugar.

What do you tell your child when you decide not to buy the cereal? Say, “This is not a ‘good-for-you’ cereal. We want to buy a ‘good-for-you’ cereal to help you grow healthy and strong.” Check labels on other cereals and let him choose from the cereals that are low in sugar. If your child is unhappy because you aren’t going to buy the cereal he wants, move away from the cereal display. Go on and do the rest of your shopping. You can spend time reading cereal labels when you are shopping alone.

Be Good to Yourself: When You’re All Tied Up in Knots

Stress can make your body feel bad. Over the long term, stress can cause physical damage. Over the short term, you may feel headaches, tight muscles, backaches or a stiff neck. Here are some exercises you can do any time to relieve the physical effects of stress:

Games for Growing

What’s Your Name?

Purpose of the Game: To give your child practice saying his first and last name and to help him feel good about himself.

How to Play

When you are with your child, say his name to him in songs and stories, using his last name, too. Make up games where he tells his name. Show him how much you enjoy it when he names himself in his photographs.

Happy Face Colors

Purpose of the Game: To help your child learn to solve problems and to match colors.

Materials:

How to Make the Game:

How To Play: Place the happy face cardboard or opened manila file folder in front of your child on the floor, or at a table.

One by one, give the child different colored happy face circles. Encourage him to put each one on the same colored happy face glued to the cardboard. Say the name of the color as your child puts each happy face on the correct color.

When all the faces have been matched, have your child pick up the happy face circles one by one and hand them back to you. Say the color of each circle as your child hands it back to you.

Fun Drummer

Purpose of the Game: To help your child learn about different sounds and rhythms and to build coordination.

How to Play: Show your child how to make different drumming sounds by hitting things with a spoon or a fork. He can hit a pan, a chair, the floor, his shoe, a bottle and so forth. You can take turns leading the game, with each of you hitting one thing after another in sequence. You can also try drumming to or singing to music, or you can mix fast and slow drumming sounds.

Homemade Toys That Teach

Feelie Bag

Children learn by touching things around them. They learn that some things are soft and some are hard, some cool and others warm. Some things are rough and some smooth, some light and some heavy. This toy can help your toddler learn to tell one kind of feel from another.

Materials:

Making the Toy: Write your child’s name in large letters with crayon on the paper bag. This lets her know that the bag is hers and gives her the idea of writing.

Choose some things she might enjoy feeling, and put them in a bag. Examples would be a smooth rock, a rough rock, a piece of wood, a piece of paper egg carton, some pieces of cloth, a feather and so on. Be sure the things you put in the bag are not sharp or dangerous.

Playing: Close the top of the bag, leaving a hole just big enough for the child’s hand. Ask your toddler to reach in and to find something soft or hard or smooth or rough. Ask her what she has found and help her learn to say, “I have found something hard” or “I have found something rough.”

You can turn this into a guessing game. Have your toddler reach in and touch something. Have her say, “I have found something hard. What is it?” Then you guess what it is. You can take turns guessing. This is a good game for two or three children to play together. Your toddler can help you change the game by putting different things in the bag. 

Questions and Answers

Q. My son is 2 1/2 and still sucks his thumb. Is this OK?

A. Yes, thumb sucking is a very common behavior of children under 6 years old. It’s one way a young child has to comfort himself. Many doctors believe that if you keep a child from sucking his thumb or fingers, he may develop sleeping problems or begin to wet his bed. Thumb sucking usually disappears on its own, especially if the child is not pressured to give it up.

Sometimes parents pull thumbs and fingers out of their young children’s mouths because they are worried about dental problems. Dental problems do not usually occur until the child’s permanent teeth appear at 5 or 6 years of age. Even then, there may be no ill effects from casual thumb sucking.

If you are worried about your child’s thumb sucking, keep track of how often he sucks and for how long. Take these notes for several days. This record will help you and your doctor or dentist discuss the situation and decide what to do about it.


Sources

“A Guide for Home Care and Prevention of Childhood Injuries,” (1986). North County Health Services, Maternal and Child Health Department, San Marcos, California. Reprints by permission.

Ames, L.B. and F.L. (1976). Your Two-Year-Old: Terrible or Tender. New York: Dell Publishing Co. Inc.

Caplan. T. and F. Caplan (1983). The Early Childhood Years: The Two- to Six-Year-Old. New York: Bantam Books.

Halverson, V., A. Maretzske and J. Kreeger (1981). Keike 'O Hawaii. Cooperative Extension, Hawaii.

Honig, A.S. (1981). “Infants: Their Social Environments.” Recent Infancy Research, B. Weissbourd & J. Musick (Eds). Washington, D.C., National Association for the Education of Young Children.

Lally, J.R. and I.J. Gordon (1977). Learning Games for Infants and Toddlers. New York: New Readers Press, Publishing Division of Laubach Literacy International. Reprinted by permission.

Lamberts, M. (1980). Young Parent. Cooperative Extension, Washington State.

White, B.L. (1985). The First Three Years of Life. New Jersey: Prentice-Hall Press.

Contributors

Happy Face Colors: Donna Daly, family day care provider.

Nutrition: Joanne Ikeda, M.A., R.D., nutrition education specialist, University of California Cooperative Extension.

Health: Joan Fenske, R.N., D.N.S., California Department of Health Services.

Suggested Reading

Child Learning Through Child Play: Learning Activities for Two- and Three-Year-Olds by Ira J. Gordon et. al. (1972), St. Martin: Griffin (paperback).

  This fact sheet series gives equal time and space to both sexes.


For more information on family issues, contact your county Extension office or the Family Living Office, University of Maine Cooperative Extension, 5717 Corbett Hall, Orono, ME 04469-5717, (207) 581-3448/3104 or 1-800-287-0274 (in Maine).

Published and distributed in furtherance of Acts of Congress of May 8 and June 30, 1914, by the University of Maine Cooperative Extension, the Land Grant University of the state of Maine and the U.S. Department of Agriculture cooperating. Cooperative Extension and other agencies of the U.S.D.A. provide equal opportunities in programs and employment.


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